A Day in an English Class in America

Voices in my head,
Voices around me,
I turn my head around
In a chamber filled with others,
To eye on their mouths rapidly
Moving,
Twitching,
Producing sounds to add to a symphony of angelic choruses,
Or to condemn to hell litanies of said words
Not worthy to be enthroned.

With eyes but little lines carved on yellow skin,
I sometimes peer out the translucent barrier
Perhaps to catch a glimpse of something else
That might excite me,
An altogether ingenious excuse
To avoid the cloistered realm,
Where the celestial war rages
Among the others.

And I,
On the outskirts,
Am always invited to join in
The battle that is never mine,
To carry weapons that are foreign,
To tear down what is truly in my heart,
Forced to feign a face bright with a large smile,
But deep inside, my blood seethe with inexpressible anger,
Nothing but conflicted feelings,
That I'd betrayed my roots,
Sold my worth to others
Who'd read so much,
Yet whose feet are so firmly planted
On this soil of supposed freedom and beauty,
Unable to understand what it means
To be of both worlds,
But in actuality,
Neither.

Comfort Foods

In these past few days, I have started to think more about what I would define as my comfort food. I used to think the 70 sen tau sar pau as a comforting breakfast food until I tried making it here, which is a pain, or the hot and spicy fried chicken from KFC, until I realized that the only spicy stuff in American KFCs is their hot sauce, which is ironically not hot, or pipping hot bak kut teh, until I forget that I costs a bomb to make it here.

Well, I've begun reevaluating my cravings nowadays. Sadly to say, my stomach's been moving towards Chick-Fil-A's chicken sandwich and Nong Shim's "Indo-mie," Chapagetti. It is just this very day that I had a sampling of both my recent favorites, which I have tried to resist against for a while now. The sumptuous chicken sandwich with a touch of mayonaise... Heaven. And the Korean ramen version of the Chajang Myun.... So delectable. God save me.

Head or Tail, It’s Part of the Same Coin

Flip a coin, pray for heads,
Hope for an angel to emerge from cupped hands,
Eyes staring, sweat dripping down my brows,
Drums rolling within my heart…
Silence.
Light faded, darkness enters,
When Lucifer gaily laughs at Adam and Eve,
And my life dangles precariously on its tail.
Such luck, huh?
They say you win some, you lose some.
But when you toss a coin,
Heads or tails dictate your destiny,
This time,
I thought I lost everything,
In this game of life.
Flip it again,
Glittering the coin goes,
Flittering up and then descends nonchalantly,
Into the hands of One,
Whose grace is sufficient for me.
Surfacing from the palms that holds both life and death,
Gabriel stands, announcing peace,
Then, everything hangs in a standstill,
In awe,
Like a child staring at billowing clouds in an empty blue sky,
When I realize that sorrow lies for only a time,
And that life has two sides,
Enclosed inside the hands of the Great I AM.

When Leaves Fall in Autumn

Down, down, down, one by one, the leaves fall down,

Everything is stripped apart, brown with frown.

Walking on the sideway thinking of Fall,

When beauty untainted walked fair with God,

Till folly chokes her to the depths writes Paul,

And now we thread aimlessly as we plod.

Down, down, down, one by one, the leaves fall down,

Everything is stripped apart, none with crown.

Falling into the nothingness, I pray,

When the cold chill slowly creeps in and drags

The leaves down, do we not too go astray?

Down on the ground, we're nothing but soiled rags.

Down, down, down, one by one, the leaves fall down,

Nothing is left, all is waiting to drown.

Nothing more than the warmth of an embrace
I long as I stared at the falling leaves,
Asking, seeking for any sign of grace,
Can there be such a man our grief relieves?

日記第一

先セメ、僕はジャズ・マランカといっしょにレッドダートチャレンジをやりました。そのイベントはトライアスロンでした。そのチャレンジに三つのうんどうがありました。トライアスロンをやる日、チャレンジで、入るみんなが２マイルはしって、７マイルカヤックをして、３マイルじてんしゃをのらなければなりませんでした。そのイベントのきょうぎの中では、カヤックをするのがいちばん楽しかったと思います。

チャレンジするため、やりたい人が一人のパートナーを見つけなければなりませんでした。僕はそのイベントに入りたいけど、だれも僕のパートナーにならなかったので、レッドダートチャレンジをやれなかった。だけど、そのまえの日、ジャズのパートナーがびょうきになった。ですから、ジャズがチャレンジをまだやりたければ、あたらしいパートナーを見つけなければなりませんでした。そして、僕はジャズがパートナーがほしいって聞いた時、ジャズにそのことをすぐ話しました。

そのあと、僕はジャズのパートナーになりました。チャレンジの日、７時におきて、僕はジャズといっしょに車でバッフォローギャップという町に行きました。チャレンジでじてんしゃにのるため、僕たちも自分のじてんしゃを持って行きました。そのばしょにいくのに、３０分かかりました。それから、イベントのところにつくまえ、僕はそのトライアスロンで力が出るように、僕はジャズに食べ物を食べさせられました。

げんじつに、そのイベントは僕のはじめてのトライアスロンでした。チャレンジにはいるまえ、いつもびょうきになったり、つかれたり、よわくなったりしました。それでも、僕はじつりょくをたしかめたいので、そのイベントをやりたかった。

１０時ぐらいに、チャレンジがはじまりました。僕とジャズがしょしんしゃだったから、どんどん僕たちはいちばんうしろにちかづいてしまいました。だけど、あきらめないで、僕たちはそのレースでさいぜんをつくしました。じてんしゃにのっている時、きゅうなおかでじてんしゃをはやくこいでいたので、僕はじてんしゃからおちてけがをしました。その時に、ジャズが僕のうしろにいたのでどうやって僕がおちたのかを全部しっていました。ジャズによると、じてんしゃからおちる時、はじめに、僕はじてんしゃから上にとびました。ころんだあと､ かおとひざをひどくけがしました。本当に、その時がいちばんこわっかたです。おちるまえ、僕は落ちるのがわかったから、神様におもしろく日本語で「神様、たすけてくれ！」とさけびました。その時、ぼくは死ぬと思っていた。でも、僕のかおが土についたあと、ぼくのめがねがこわれないように、神がぼくをたすけてくれました。やっぱり、もし僕のめがねがこわれたら、今日ぼくはもうもくの人になったかもしれない。

それから、ジャズがむりょくな僕をてつだってくれて、きゅうきゅうしゃをよんでくれました。その時、僕の体がいたくなったり、ひざも血が出ていたり、かおがすべて血で覆われていたりしました。しかし、きゅうきゅうしゃがはやく来てくれて、僕はかんしゃしました。きゅうきゅうしゃから出て来た二人のやさしいきゅうきゅうたいいんが、僕をきゅうきゅうしゃにはこびました。中で、かれらが僕をかいふくさせながら、僕といろいろなことをしゃべっていました。一人のきゅうきゅうたいいんはかんたんに僕のきずにほうたいをまきながら、僕とじょうだんを言いあっていました。その人の名前はブッシュだから、はじめに僕に会った時、僕に「わしはアメリカのだいとうりょうです。お会いできてこうえいです。」と言っていました。まだ僕がこんらんしていたので、かれによわく「よろしく。」と言いました。１５分たったあと、かれらは僕のほうたいをまきおわりました。その時、僕がきゅうに元気になって、自分で立つことができて、なおりそうだったから、レースをさいごまでやりとげたかった。でも、きゅうきゅうたいいんたちが僕に「あなたはレースをやめて、やすんだほうがいいです」って言ったけど、まだ僕はチャレンジをやりとげるつもりでした。僕がいためたから、ふつうのじょうきょうでレースをおわるようにきょかしてもらえなかったけど、まだ僕たちはチャレンジをできました。僕はきゅうきゅうたいいんたちに「レースをやりとげたいんです」と言っている時、僕の顔がまじめだったから、かれらが僕にチャレンジをつづけさせてくれたのかもしれない。ジャズも僕をおうえんしてくれたので、レースをやりとげること、がんばってみたかった。それで、ゆっくりじてんしゃにのって、チャレンジができました。チャレンジはむずかしくていたかったけど、僕たちがさいごまでさいぜんをつくしてよかった。
もし一つまなんだことがあるとすれば、それは僕の人生がむずかしくても、僕はあきらめない人ということです。僕は神様といっしょにいることもまなびました。

What Sim Could Have Been Thinking About If He Had to Write Something On the Spot

I wrote this paper just a while ago. Yet, I can't get around the fact that Simon has impacted me in such a way that I can actually write such an ingenuous prose. So, kudos to Sim, my "cape crusader"!

What is the Gospel?

Imagine being a sidekick of a superhero. Imagine the fame, glory and honor for being able to participate alongside Batman in the action of saving Gotham City. Do halt pondering about the metaphor immediately if you are thinking about the ludicrous red velvety tights Robin wears. Unfortunately, such a figurative manner of portraying the gospel has its limits. Then again, by using this approach, a reasonable, yet fresh, understanding of the gospel can be observed. So, if God is the hero and those who have responded to the gospel are God’s sidekicks, the gospel can then be fully comprehended as an invitation in partaking in the mission of God’s kingdom. Thus, the good news becomes a verb in the present continuous tense, rather than just a product that guarantees salvation if accepted at a certain point in life. Nonetheless, many church-going, Bible-believing Christians are more inclined to take the latter definition of the good news, probably writhing at the thought of becoming God’s Robin. After all, who in the right of mind wants to wear such a tight and humiliating outfit? Anyway, aside from the crude humor, perhaps modern Christians are so indoctrinated with the “product gospel” because the modern church has so codified the gospel in the consumerist language. This obviously also results in the good news of Jesus Christ becoming a doctrine about the “I” pronoun, rather than being about what God has done. After all, do we not hear in church that the good news is about “my” salvation, “my” baptism and “my” Jesus?

Sadly, we have replaced the cover of every Batman comic with that of Robin’s images. Such a thought only brings chills to one’s back, especially if it has to do with Robin’s ridiculous costume. Yet, it is the truth. For what God desires is, through His gospel, a partnership with humanity – He is the hero and we are his sidekick. Nonetheless, the postmodern and post-enlightenment good news has been degraded to the point that God has no place in it anymore. Even if He does have a room in such a gospel, He is still almost always not the focal point of it. Much worse, God acts like a puppet king, whereby we act as his ventriloquist, mouthing words as if they are the actual words of God. For instance, many Christians often have their preconceived ideas about the gospel, and to justify their opinions, they make it seem as if their message is in accordance to the Bible.

Perhaps, we might have jumped a little ahead of what the gospel, in its simplistic form, means. Despite the tying in with the hero-sidekick mythos, the gospel is still about the life, death and resurrection of Jesus. Thus, without Jesus, there is no good news. Nevertheless, the gospel is not just about what God has done through Jesus. There is a choice to be made after the gospel is presented. Either one rejects it or one accepts it. There are no maybes here. If one chooses to accept the good news, that person is essentially joining with Christ in His mission of opening the eyes of the blind, of freeing the captives from prison and the releasing of those who sit in the dungeon of darkness.

Of course, this partnership is also hinted at in the wedding feast of the Lamb in Revelation. Here, the church, the bride of Christ, celebrates and participates with her Bridegroom. The wedding feast is not depicted as a Christ-only affair. It is the merry-making with the Church – an act of cooperation. Similarly, when Jesus promises the indwelling of the Holy Spirit, He is talking about the Christian individual working together with God. Thus, the good news of Jesus Christ is not merely about God alone, or humankind alone. It is a beautiful picture of the coming together of the Divine and His people in a oneness – a dance, one might even add – never thought possible. Without one or the other, the good news sounds vain and is no different from the other world religions. In any case, Christ has not left us with that definition. That only brings back the metaphor of Batman and his sidekick, the leader and his assistant swashbuckling through the darkness of Gotham City. It really does make so much sense to picture Christ as Batman and the church as Robin, does it not?

Much Ado About Nothing

Yeah, yeah, I know, I haven't been really blogging much. I suppose, with the amount of work I do these days, I'm basically much ado about nothing. Ah well, the life on an English major, or otherwise known as a paper-writing machine. Here's my newest addition to my repertoire of essays (sigh):

The Neighbor According to Jesus

Perhaps one of the most illustrious parables of Jesus, the parable of the Good Samaritan is found only within the Gospel of Luke. In the 10^th chapter, beginning with the 25^th verse, Jesus is confronted with a question by an “expert of the Law,” who asks, “Teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?” Instead of giving the answer, Jesus throws back the question to the lawyer, who in turn answers his own inquiry. Drawing his response from the Torah, or the Law, the expert responds, “'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'; and, 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'” Jesus, then, commands the man to do similarly. However, to justify himself, the expert again queries Jesus, “And who is my neighbor?” In reaction, Jesus begins to tell the man a parable, the parable we now dub the parable of the Good Samaritan. In his story, Jesus talks about a man, who came from Jerusalem, and is heading to Jericho. On the journey, a band of robbers comes into the scene, beats the traveler up, steals his possessions and leaves him to die. Subsequently, a Jewish priest comes by the same road; sees the injured man, and passes by the other side. Next a religious Levite treads around the place, and does the same as the priest. Finally, a Samaritan turns up, and upon seeing the man, the readers are told that he bandages and cleans the half-dead man, and takes him to an inn to recover. Of course, the Samaritan’s benevolence is further demonstrated as he pays, also, the bills of the wounded person. After finishing with the parable, Jesus again asks the Torah expert, “Which of these three do you think was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?” The lawyer answers, “The one who had mercy on him.” Then, Jesus charges the man to do likewise. (The New International Version, Luke 10.25-37)

From the reading of the passage, it is clear that the Law requires its adherers to love their neighbors, implying that the neighbor is the object of the act of love. However, Jesus’ view of the neighbor does not just encompass the traditional perspective. Rather, he challenges, if not redefines, what a neighbor should be to his listeners. Thus, through the parable of the Good Samaritan, Jesus includes that a neighbor is not only a person who is in need, but also one who is different from us and simultaneously, us.

Firstly, in the parable, in accordance to the Law, the injured man can definitely fit into a definition of a neighbor. After all, he is the recipient of the mercy dispensed by the Samaritan. This certainly matches with the Random House Dictionary’s definition of the word neighbor, “one’s fellow human being,” as the Samaritan shows mercy to an equal species, the injured traveler. Yet, one may question why Jesus’ parable ends up with the Samaritan as the neighbor instead of the beaten-up traveler. Assuming that Jesus has not misheard the expert’s question, one can either witness Jesus as he detangles a common stereotype, or conclude that he has no shred of intelligence to come up with an adequate answer. However, for the sake of a purposeful evaluation, let us assume the former, and discard the latter (with no hint of regret, lest the reader turns into a pillar of salt). As such, Jesus is not trying to undermine the traditional view of one’s neighbor. On the contrary, he desires instead to unravel the often times clouded, misled and discriminatory perception of who a neighbor can also be.

Since the neighbor is the Samaritan, rather than a Jew, it can be implied that Jesus is hinting that the neighbor can also include a person who is different, perhaps even despised. Of course, Jesus’ tactics in proving his point can be argued against. Obviously, it is only Jesus who can set up such an elaborate trap, which requires the poor lawyer to choose the Samaritan as the only suitable answer to his own question. Even then, the expert fails to utter the word Samaritan, only able to pronounce weakly, “the one who had mercy.” This indirectly reveals his discrimination of the reviled half-Jewish inhabitants of Samaria. From the subtle example, one can unquestionably observe the expert’s intolerance of a person dissimilar from him. Therefore, when Jesus portrays the Samaritan as the neighbor, he is essentially jabbing at the man’s prejudice of someone or something different from him. Furthermore, to compliment his point, Jesus depicts the Samaritan as helping a non-Samaritan – an act of showing love to a stranger. Doing so, Jesus is helping the lawyer to see beyond his discrimination, and recognize that a neighbor too can be the one he hates.

Finally, as Jesus commands the expert of the law to “do likewise,” he is also implying that the man should be a neighbor like the Samaritan. In other words, Jesus means that the neighbor is us, as well. This certainly ties well with another definition of “neighbor” found in the Random House Dictionary, “a person who shows kindliness or helpfulness toward his or her fellow humans.” When the lawyer asks the question about the identity of his neighbor, his intent lies in his desires to hear an answer from Jesus that he can easily digest. Thus, his motivation to is to show that he has done all he can to love such a person. However, instead of addressing the lawyer’s issues of the neighbor’s identity, Jesus points back to him, almost as if accusing him, “Have you yourself been a neighbor to others?” Then, he commands the man to be a neighbor, just like the Samaritan, who shows mercy in the parable. So, in this case, Jesus desires that we should be neighbors to others.

Thus, it is irrefutable that, according to Jesus, a definition of a neighbor transcends stereotypical beliefs and personal prejudices. On the wide spectrum, Jesus offers his view of a neighbor, that he is not only a person we are able to love, but also includes our enemy, while at the same time being ourselves. Apparently, the conclusion of who should be our neighbor ends up differently from what is expected. Such a feat is nothing less from Jesus, who is intentional in not mouthing out clichés. On the contrary, the Lion of Judah is aggressively out to take captive a people to make into critical thinkers.